Sleep
When you become a parent, your sleeping habits change. First, of course, you sleep less. You are up when they are. Sometimes you are up in the middle of the night. You are almost always up much earlier in the morning than you’d like to be. In addition to sleeping less though, your quality of sleep is different. You don’t sleep as soundly. You listen for a whimper or a cry in the middle of the night. You are prepared for the possibility that your child might need you. You are ready to go to and comfort them. You get used to this though. You assure yourself that it is all worth it. You learn to function on less sleep and you feel okay.
When you become the parent of a child with cancer, your sleeping habits really change. You rarely sleep, if at all. Your body seems to be in a constant state of panic. You are always ready to jump out of bed and run to your child. You worry that they are in pain or that they are afraid. You are always ready for an emergency. You are always on guard. Even if they are sleeping soundly, you watch. You listen. You wait.
The thought of really sleeping is not only impossible, it’s terrifying.
- Posted in: Uncategorized
- Tagged: anxiety, childhood cancer, illness, leukemia, parenting, sleep
healingmaya 
I understand. Holding you in the Light–Barb
Thank you Barb.
oh Jo-Ann. I can’t even imagine how hard it’s for you. Maybe you can take shifts with Jim so that you get that needed rest. Maya can maybe sense your anxiety and if you could rest more, it may be a little easier to deal with this horrible disease. You’re so eloquent in expressing your heart. Keep up this blog, its somewhat therapy for you. Love, prayers and thoughts. Aunt Barbara
You are a wondereful, loving mother honey. If at night you are awake and afraid, your mommy will always be there for you honey, I am here always. Even though you are a grown woman, I too will always wonder and worry if you are alright. Love you with all my heart and soul baby, always.